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Mile One.
Mile One.
Friends, Family, Loved Ones, Church Members, and Honored Guests!
The beginning of our new journey has arrived! It's been about two weeks since embarking on a year of transformation. I have learned lots, and hope to learn much more! I am excited to say that we have already completed a few small goals, but first...I think I should give you some back story!
Many times throughout my life, God has intervened. I have seen him move in my life. I have heard him speak to me through constant prayer and meditation. He teaches me life lessons through other people around me. Sometimes, I feel like God is leading me in certain directions. My husband is a good example. I prayed and asked God to send me a man who would guide me down the right path and who would keep me honorable until marriage--a month later I met Warner. Our last move was yet another example. I couldn't explain it, but I felt like God wanted us to sell our house. We had talked about it multiple times, but never did anything about it. One day I just told Warner that it was time to put our house on the market, and we spent the next month preparing. In that time we found the home we wanted, it sold to someone else, and then the day our house went back on the market the house came back too! We sold ours and bought the other all in the same weekend. This transition put us near to Warner's parents which was a blessing since his father's health declined rapidly the next year. We were able to house my father on hospice until he passed. We found out we were pregnant with Iris during the move! We were closer to Martinsville which is where Warner ended up being called as a pastor. All of these events resulted from listening to Gods voice and tugs to move. Many times I have had inklings like this, and my husband, God bless him, trusts me. I have learned over the years not to argue with God or combat his movements in my life. Recently, I have felt this next tug and pull, and let me tell you it will be a doozy.
Develop a Genesis Fund
Develop a Genesis Fund
Now, I know what you are thinking...crazy right? Who is Genesis, and why does she need money? LOL. Well, let me tell you that this first statement is LOADED! For a few years now, I have been thinking long and hard about family. What should a family look like? How should families develop within the framework of each other? How did families look in the Old Testament? How does the world view family now and what are the current standards?
Here are my conclusions. The ideal family looks like two parents, two kids, a house with a dog and white picket fence. Well, this is what I thought it was growing up, but my personal family did not look like that at all. We lived in an unfinished 900 square foot cement block home with mold in the bathroom, woods for days, and concrete floors. My parents loved me. They worked hard, but my Dad never finished a project in which he started. He had a hard time with commitment both on projects and in marriage which resulted in him leaving my mom for another woman. (Now, I love my step mom to pieces, but that does not change the fact that he left.) My family looked nothing like the white picket fence design.
As I grew up, I noticed that the standard was for kids to finish high school, go to college, gain a career, get married, buy a house of their own, have kids and start the process all over again. Again, my life did not look like this...I got married after high school, dropped out of college, had kids, went back to college, started a career, left that career and now stay home with my children. What happened? I have watched these processes again and again with friends growing up and marrying all around me. Every single story is different, but almost all of them are the same in one aspect: Leave and Cleave.
In Genesis, God commands a husband and wife to become one flesh--to leave the house of your father and mother and cleave to each other. This is pretty much what everyone does, but what I don't see is that every single one of them have their own mortgage, their own cell phone plans, their own debts....the list goes on and on. What I noticed a lot is that these family units often lived together in a land. Sharing the load of tending crops, animals, and the chores of maintaining the home. When did this change? When did people start migrating so far away from a large family unit to a micro-one? I just don't want to live like that anymore.
Now...before you get upset, this idea and concept is not for everyone. I too did the micro family unit lifestyle, but I feel that God is calling our family to something larger.
Now...before you get upset, this idea and concept is not for everyone. I too did the micro family unit lifestyle, but I feel that God is calling our family to something larger.
I desire to live in a place where we can all live together sustainably. It has been on my heart for quite some time, and honestly it was the farthest idea from my mind about 5 years ago. I truly believe God birthed this idea into me, and has allowed it to build overtime. So here is the dream:
I want to purchase land, build a decent sized home on it with in-law quarters, and have the means to build homes for our children's families as well.
I want to purchase land, build a decent sized home on it with in-law quarters, and have the means to build homes for our children's families as well.
This may not seem like a big deal to you, but for us this is big. We JUST MOVED! We promised we would never move again, but God I think has other plans. Watching Warner's father pass, and caring for my father on Hospice in our home made me realize just how short time is with our loved ones. I don't want any of my parents or in-laws to go into a home, so we need a means to care for them in ours. I also don't want our children to feel like they have to leave...like EVER. I will never hold one of them back, and if they choose to go adventure in the big wide world that is perfectly fine. However, I want them to know that we will always have space and a place where they can be and thrive if they choose.
The tricky part of this dream, is not the idea but the finances to complete it.
The tricky part of this dream, is not the idea but the finances to complete it.
It is no secret. Warner and I were complete idiots when we got married. We were just in love and ready to start the adventure of life. We sucked at money. Didn't know how banks or bank statements worked. Didn't really have a basis on how to save money ingrained in our heads, and just went with our whims. We have learned a lot over the past 20 years of marriage, and God has always met every need. BUT this dream seems out of reach. Every time I would mention it or talk about it, I knew it was just that...a dream. A fantasy life that I could wish and daydream about all day long, but reality would never allow it.
BUT GOD.....in early December I was day dreaming again about it and lamenting that our financial state would never get us in a position to do that. Then, I quite literally heard in my head, "Why don't you do something about it?" What the heck? I stopped dead in my tracks. I knew that tug. I knew that voice, and I knew instantly what I had to do...change. God was calling us out of the same misuse and disillusionment about money. It almost felt like a challenge.
"If you want it so bad," said God, "then change.
"If you want it so bad," said God, "then change.
Do the work and watch me do mine."
Do the work and watch me do mine."
My response? Challenge accepted.
So here we are!
So here we are!
You learned the why and now it is time for the update on the how.
You learned the why and now it is time for the update on the how.
Well, ofcourse, we had to get through Christmas and New Years. All of which were somewhat of a blur, and also just what I needed to do some preliminary work on things. I knew exactly where we needed to start, and that was with partners. As a person with ADHD, I get really excited and into new shiny projects. Then I get bored, leave them unfinished and start something new. I had to figure out a way to combat my brain.
So, I opted to share my desires with some people in my circle who I knew would help encourage us, share money saving tips, scripture, and love. I made packets with self-addressed envelopes, blank note paper, and a letter explaining pretty much what you just read. I requested that these things come in the mail for two reasons:
I love getting things in the mail that are not bills.
I know that when they are sent to me throughout the year, it will be exactly what God wants me to hear at exactly the right time.
I have already received one such letter in the mail, and I have to tell you it was chock full of good information about bill paying strategies, saving on dates/outings, meal prep, etc. I ate it up so quickly. So step one complete: get someone to keep me motivated and accountable.
Step Two:
Step Two:
Figure my life out.
Figure my life out.
It was time to finally tackle the piles and piles of mail, emails, and to dos on my desk. I don't know if you know this, but another perk of ADHD is piling things up so that they appear clean and tidy but you avoid doing it at all costs. That is finances, mail, email, etc in a nutshell for me. It was a pile that if I avoided long enough would get moved somewhere else multpile times until I had to do something about it...well that day came.
After the piles were officially filed, organized, and task lists were created, it was time to figure out the bank account. What subsriptions did we have? What all is on auto pay and what is not? Do we really need all of these things...what the heck are we paying for on Google One two times a month? (When I say that I avoided this stuff, I was not kidding.) God has been dealing with my sin for years of avoidance, and finally last month we had a break through. I was ready to let it go, by getting it back under control. So we did.
I cancelled ALL of our subscriptions including the tv ones we love so much. Instead I figured out which ones we really used, and asked for gift cards from our parents to pay for part of them throughout the year.
I itemized everything for the past 6 months to find out where the money was going, and let me tell you it was SHOCKING.
I created a debt snowball list with a plan in place to hopefully pay it all off within the next year and a half.
I shared my findings with Warner and we talked about how we needed to change.
I FINALLY got our insurance issues figured out, and now have an affordable plan that will enable us to receive healthcare.
We finally ditched Verizon and their high cost plans and switched to MINT mobile. (Yes, the one Ryan Reynolds promotes.)
We paid off two of our smallest debts with additional funds available after creating budget limits.
Created budget sheets and put stipulations on how much we could spend in each category.
Results?
Results?
Saved $180 on subscriptions a month.
Saved $250 a month on Verizon. (our new plan is pay once for the whole year/six months. This averages out to about $18 a month!)
Saved $120 a month on two smaller debts in which we paid off.
Total : $550 a month!
Needless to say that God is good. We are still learning and we are still motivated. I am sure that in a few months my tune will be different when we are in the thick of debt repayment and saving, but for now, I am going to take my wins! God is victorious and we have made some tiny steps toward our goal!
Keep us in your prayers. We love each of you, and pray for you continually. Whatever it is you are facing in life right now, know that God has got your back. He is in the business of restoration! Check back in a few weeks to get our next update!
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