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"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act,
"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act,
but a habit."
but a habit."
Aristotle
Aristotle
I absolutely abhor routine.
I absolutely abhor routine.
(Disclaimer: Before you stop reading because you feel very strongly about a routine, please read to the end...spoilers I just didn't know how to use them effectively.)
There are multiple reasons why routines and I are not friends. All of which hold equal value in resentment, and I feel that they are valid. Now I know that most of these reasons are selfish, but remember, I grew up in the 80s and 90s. It was a wild place. My parents didn't have a routine for me so I didn't really understand the benefits. I just lived my life and enjoyed it.
I have ADHD. Trying to do ANYTHING consistently no matter how well planned is difficult for my brain to maintain. I start something with my all and get about 60% done. Then I get bored and start something new. (Let's hope my blog lasts longer LOL)
I like to just go with the flow in my day. When I wake up and the sun is shining, my mind starts racing with all the fun adventures we could have outside. We can get to the other stuff later. If someone calls sporadically about going to the park, well then folks lets get our behinds to the park!
We never really established a consistent bed time with our own children. We didn't want their bed times to dictate our lives or opportunities. (Yes I know this is selfish.) It was hard to see the fun that some parents miss when they adhere to such stern bedtimes.
I like to be flexible and available when someone needs me for help. If a friend calls with an emergency, I want to be in a position to be able to run over and help. I don't want to miss an opportunity to be there for a friend when he or she needs me.
I have quite a few mom friends who are QUEENS of routine. Their children go to bed at a certain time every night. They have scheduled times each evening with their spouse, and seem to have it all together. Do I get jealous of this?? Absolutely. I think and dream about this lifestyle, and I have tried to implement a routine many times. It goes fine for about a week or two, and then one or two slips and KABOOM! Back to square one.
Sometimes I think that I am just a failure. I need to try harder to force myself to keep it consistent. Then there are times that I just don't think it is super healthy to be SO unbendable that you cannot enjoy life. I am in constant fluctuation on this particular topic.
Which is healthier? Either option, routine or no routine, can be justified. So what do the scriptures say about it? Let's look at some verses I have heard from others when I discuss my disdain for routine. These particular verses are the ones friends and/or family have quoted when encouraging me to utilize a routine.
Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it. —Proverbs 22:6 NASB
Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it. —Proverbs 22:6 NASB
This particular verse is commonly utilized when encouraging parents of young children to teach them about Jesus early.
DISCLAIMER: The teachings listed below are NOT MY TEACHINGS, so I have them in red. These are things I have read in my study of other bloggers, heard from other people, read in a book, etc. So do not quote me on these teachings. I just wanted to share what others have said regarding this particular verse. Some teachings could include:
Don't wait until later, or they will never learn.
I need to start my children learning early because if I do not they will turn away from God.
My kids were in church from an early age so they will never turn away from God.
Let's look at the verse, Proverbs 22:6, in an expositional format; meaning, lets look at intended audience, the author, and where is Jesus in it all.
Author: Solomon
Intended Audience: any and all who would listen and definitely his son
If we look at this verse bit by bit we can see the following:
Train up a child
to teach or instruct at an early age
in the way he should go
according to his way
his- adapting to the child's needs
his-future calling
his- meaning the BIG H (HIS) God's way
even when he is old he will not depart from it
firm foundation established
potential to bear fruit throughout life
training becomes second nature
uneasily forgotten
Now the question is...Is this a good verse to utilize when counseling others about creating a routine for their children? I would agree that it is a good verse to counsel parents about creating the habit/routine of training children early in the ways of the Lord. It is not a verse that could be utilized or misconstrued to say that you need to train someone early to the habit of brushing their teeth every day. This would be taking the verse out of context, since it solely discusses creating a habit of learning about and loving God from a young age. Let's analyze another...
A sluggard’s appetite is never filled, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied. —Proverbs 13:4
A sluggard’s appetite is never filled, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied. —Proverbs 13:4
This particular verse, is a warning against laziness.
DISCLAIMER: The teachings listed below are NOT MY TEACHINGS, so I have them in red(AGAIN!). These are things I have read in my study of other bloggers, heard from other people, read in a book, etc. So do not quote me on these teachings. I just wanted to share what others have said regarding this particular verse.
Some teachings could include:
As opposed to laziness, your diligence is necessary to be satisfied.
Young adults are encouraged to work hard to ensure prosperity.
A mom warns against laziness when she wants her child to clean his or her room.
I cannot be lazy or rest because there is so much work to be done.
I must be doing something productive at all times.
If I am productive, then I will be blessed.
If I work hard, then I will be blessed and have everything that I want.
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Let's look at the text in an expositional format once more.
Author: Solomon
Intended Audience: any and all who would listen and definitely his son
If we look at this verse bit by bit we will see the following:
A sluggards appetite
a lazy person's desires, wants, needs or dreams
is never filled
no achievement
But the desires
wants, dreams, or needs
of the diligent
those who put in the work with perseverance
are fully satisfied
can reap the harvest of that work
Now again the question is...Is this a good verse to utilize when counseling others about creating a routine for their children? I would say YES! A diligent person puts in the work or effort in order to reap the harvest of their productiveness. A sluggard reaps a harvest of their work as well. I can surmise that if I want something to be finished or completed then I must put in the work to do so. If my desire, want, need, or dream is to have a bed time for my children that is consistent, then I need to put in the work to reap the harvest. The amount of effort or work that I put into my desires, wants, needs, or dreams will reflect the result of that energy. Let's look at another one...
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. —2 Timothy 1:7
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline. —2 Timothy 1:7
This particular verse, is a warning against fear.
DISCLAIMER: The teachings listed below are NOT MY TEACHINGS(AGAIN!AGAIN!), so I have them in red. These are things I have read in my study of other bloggers, heard from other people, read in a book, etc. So do not quote me on these teachings. I just wanted to share what others have said regarding this particular verse.
Some teachings could include:
There is a boldness to be found in a relationship with Christ.
There is power in His name.
There is a comfort in His love which we are commanded to share.
Self discipline comes naturally from a relationship with Christ.
Due to their lack of routine, they lack self discipline.
I have to be very outgoing and bold.
I should make God's power known in a bold way.
We should not be timid but aggressive in our boldness to share the gospel.
We have been given power by God, so we are like God.
God gave us a spirit to love, so we should love everyone and accept all of their behaviors.
I must be self disciplined to the point that I can no longer enjoy things other than christian things.
I must be self disciplined in all areas of my life, or I am not successful.
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Let's look at the text in an expositional format once more.
Author: Paul
Intended Audience: Timothy at the Church of Ephesus
If we look at this verse bit by bit we will see the following:
For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid
God did not give us a spirit of FEAR
fear of sharing the gospel
fear of government
fear of adversity
fear of financial stressors
fear of the unknown
fear of health issues
the list goes on and on...
but gives us power
resilience against attacks from the enemy
faith to endure persecution
love
serve others willingly and sacrificially
comfort
empathy
and self control
ability to control our emotional response
ability to portray a faithful response in the midst of adversity
Now again the question is...Is this a good verse to utilize when counseling others about creating a routine for their children? I would say no. Just because the verse says "self discipline" does not mean this verse is about consistency or routine. This particular verse encourages a believer to share the gospel boldly no matter what is going on in the sinful world around you. God's got this. It is safe to say that living in the boldness of Christ is a habit that will come naturally to a believer who fosters a relationship with Him; therefore, power, love and self control will abound.
So...What does the Bible say about routine, consistency, habit, etc?
So...What does the Bible say about routine, consistency, habit, etc?
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8 states the following:
"There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace."
Author: Solomon
Intended Audience: the Jewish People
Ecclesiastes as a whole is a book best looked at under a broader lense.
I have pulled some thoughts (below) from another commentary which is linked at them bottom of this particular blog.
If we look at this passage we will see the following:
there are "Cycles of Nature"1
All cycles are appointed by God
"Our purpose is imbedded in His purpose"1
"Every single thing has an appointed time"1
"Life is not just on random repeat"1
"all the cycles are part of an intricate and specific plan"1
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 is a part of a much larger work written by Solomon, the Wise King. Solomon concludes that all things are futile apart from God. God has it all orchestrated and planned to the very last detail. God lives outside space and time. He has seen it all. He has been through it all. He knows it all. He was there in The Beginning and The End. Anyone who tries to explain it all using rational or reason would find the task impossible. "But, God." This conclusion is the only one that matters.
Now... can we use this verse to justify consistency and routine in our lives or for our children? Not conclusively. We can conclude that there is a season for everything under heaven. Our children are children for a season. Do they need strict bed times forever? No.
Would it be healthier for them to have consistent sleep and a certain amount of sleep? Yes. Will my body be able to do things in my late 50s that I used to do in my early 20s? Probably not. If I eat healthy, exercise, rest, and take care of myself will I be more likely to do those things in my 50s? Most likely.
Everything lasts for a season. Your choices during that season have lasting effects. Apart from God, nothing matters. Should you implement a routine for your children's bed time? Probably. It is healthier for them. Does the Bible say you have to adhere to a routine? No.
Ultimately, a routine is a choice. You get to pick and choose whichever routines are important for your family, and this season of parenthood which is just that...a season. The Bible may not say to put your children to bed at a certain time, or to brush your teeth daily, or to only eat healthy foods; however, the Bible does say that "there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven."
WAIT! There is one routine that is mentioned frequently in the scriptures.
WAIT! There is one routine that is mentioned frequently in the scriptures.
~Prayer~
~Prayer~
Prayer
Prayer
David concluded that in the morning was when he would commune with the Lord in praise and prayer.
"In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly" Psalm 5:3
"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life." Psalm 143:8
Pray in the Face of Adversity
Pray in the Face of Adversity
Daniel made it a point to pray three times a day even when he was faced with the penalty of death.
"Now when Daniel learned that the decree (no one could worship anyone or god besides King Darius) had been published, he went home to his upstairs room where the windows opened toward Jerusalem. Three times a day he got down on his knees and prayed, giving thanks to his God, just as he had done before." Daniel 6:10
Pray in Solitude
Pray in Solitude
Jesus is documented to go and pray to His Heavenly Father often. He did this alone so He could foster His relationship with the Father.
"But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed." Luke 5:16
"Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed." Mark 1:35
The scriptures are pretty clear that communing with God is a routine the should be practiced and practiced often. Be sure that amongst all of the other routines in your life that this vital piece is in place. Solitary prayer with God should be a priority, and done often.
Routines can become an idol. If your routine is so strict that God is not allowed to move in your life, then it has become an idol. Take some time to reflect on your day, and ensure that communing with God is the primary routine.
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